Kelp in the Lanes Talk-Story

"Talk Story" "Talk Story" is as much a part of Hawaiian culture as the hula and surfing are. Taking time to share a part of your life and a little laughter helps keep everything in perspective. We hope you enjoy our stories. Read a funny story here, and you will be hooked! More in the links to the left...

…How do you deal with kelp in the surfing lanes?

One cold Sunday morningat Sano with gray skies and intermittent waist-high sets, the bleak conditions didn’t exactly cause anyone to break ranks to rush into the lineup. In fact, it was a morning designed more for socializing than surfing. After an hour of coffee, pastries and one too many surf stories, Ed Escandon smacked his lips with determination and said, “I’m going for it!” He grabbed his wetsuit and ambled off to the dressing room across the way. Mouse Richey, seizing the opportunity, immediately turned Ed’s board over on the beach and started loosening the stainless steel screw in his removable fin. With the screw out, he quickly removed the fin from the box, reversed it, reset the screw and turned the board back over. Ed returned, placed his clothes on the front seat of his pickup, and went on with another tale.

Sunday mornings at Sano are like fireside chats without the fire if you know what I mean. With Ed in full story, Keith Ketcheson walked up and noticed that Ed’s fin was reversed. Puzzled he said, “Wow, that’s a pretty big kelp cutter you’ve got there, Ed!” Fortunately, Ed was at the punch line and never heard Keith or even broke rhythm. Now everyone’s aware of “Ed’s magic kelp cutter” and barely able to keep a straight face. Ed agrees, “It’s now or never.” He picked his immaculate, custom 10'6" 3-stringer Jacobs with the skeg backwards and pointing towards the nose, hoisted it up over his head and headed proudly down the beach.

Near mass-hysteria and laughter broke up the entire group. Ed then paddled out to the lineup and waited. After a 10-minute lull that seemed more like 30, Ed finally stroked into his first wave while everyone on the beach held their breath, anticipating an immediate face plant from kelp tangling around Ed’s fin. But, no… Ed glided smoothly across the wave, pulled out gracefully and headed back out for another ride. It was like watching Scott Hamilton complete a triple lutz in the Olympics! Did Ed face plant on his next wave? No, oh no! In fact, he surfed for over two hours before coming in! Kevin Deary did admit later though that he witnessed Ed take three nasty, involuntary half-gainers in complete surprise. Kevin said he laughed so hard when Ed fell that he thought he had a double hernia!

When Ed turned his board over to walk up the beach he saw the fin reversed and realized someone had pulled a rotten trick on him. He did find out it was Mouse. People have said they never heard more different ways to describe a Mouse than from Ed that day. Now both Ed and Mouse are constantly looking over their shoulder, and at their fin boxes, too. But, you know something… There sure seems to be a lot more loose kelp floating into shore at Sano these days.

~ Courtesy of Laurie Richey

Read many more very good stories at the links above!.